How to Have Certainty When You’re Feeling Lost


Certainty and change

Change can be difficult to handle for most people.  I can’t really say that it’s a normal reaction but the right word is probably “usual” and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that.  In fact, I would have to say that it is a natural reaction because not everyone has the ability to quickly adapt to a new environment, new office, new school, or new neighborhood just to cite a few examples.

The problem with this though is that if it takes you long enough, you will probably feel overwhelmed and lost and when that happens, it will begin a domino effect of negative emotions piling up one after another.  You’ll feel stressed, you’ll feel terrible, your confidence gets shattered and all of a sudden, you’re in no man’s land and full of uncertainty about what you’ll do and how you’d get out of the hell hole you’re in.

Having certainty when you’re feeling lost is not impossible.  In fact, if there’s one way of turning things around, having certainty is definitely up there but for that to happen, things need to change.


Have a plan

Okay, so it’s there.  You are in a precarious situation and sure, you’re not really happy about this abrupt change you underwent but what’s the point of fighting it back? Things are not the way they used to and you can’t impose your will because your circumstances won’t adapt to you.  It is you who needs to adapt to the situation so the first thing you need to do is get over it, and start creating a plan on how you can integrate yourself and your beliefs with this change.

Stop expecting your circumstance and the future to fit right in with what you want because that’s never going to happen.


Have an open mind

Things can go south at any time.  Your expectations may never come to fruition, your plans may not work but that’s how the world works.  None of us are clairvoyants who can tell what the future holds so the best thing to do is to be open to the different possibilities because the only thing certain in this world is change and people who succeed in life knows how to adapt no matter where the wind takes them.


Be positive and confident

When you’re lost, you’re not the biggest fan of yourself.  You start asking questions like “how do I survive this?” or “Can I get out of this situation?” and sometimes, it gets to a point where you really sound like you’ve got no other options but to throw in the towel.

How about a little positive thinking?  One of the reasons why you feel lost is because part of you feels that you can’t do it and that you’re not good enough to handle the situation.  When you begin thinking this way, you’ve already lost before you even began.  Life is unpredictable, life is unfair, call it whatever you want but in the end, it all goes back to you because even if you do not have control of the situation, you have control of yourself.

What I usually do in times like these is to tell myself that most other people have had it worse yet they were able to turn their fortunes around.  If they can do it, I can do it too.



When you feel lost and stressed, you tend to worry a lot and worse, you panic.  We both know that this is the beginning of the end because when you reach this point, you’re not going to be able to focus on finding a solution.  You’re going to be stuck with feelings of inadequacy and fear.

The best thing to do is to keep calm, collect and your thoughts.  Do a couple of inhale-exhales, close your eyes and empty your mind.  Think of yourself as a computer that you’re trying to reboot.  Once you’re done, you can now start focusing on a solution.


Be in Control

Remember what I said about not being in control of the situation but being in control of yourself?  That’s the thing you have to focus on for you to achieve certainty.  You need to stop complaining about the situation because no matter how hard you do, it won’t change unless you act on it and you can act on it by controlling what goes into your mind.

Stop focusing on the things you can’t control because that won’t get you anywhere.  Live with the fact that change is bound to happen and that there is that possibility that you won’t like it.  That’s how life is and you can’t predict nor choose the future you think is right for you.  What you can do is be ready for whatever life may bring and when it’s there, learn to accept it, adapt, and make the most out of the situation.

So how do you have certainty when you’re feeling lost?

Simple.  Always keep in mind that you can achieve certainty by accepting the fact that nothing is certain and that nothing is written in stone but that you will remain steadfast, you’ll meet the future and every change head on and that you will adapt because there’s no situation big enough for you to handle.  You got to have faith that no matter what comes, everything will always turn out for the best.

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